The Great Indian Bride

And she scrubbed her face again and again
       up and down, left and right;
As if it is going to make the man 
      at her doorstep deserve her.

She tried to look thin so that it matches 
      his academic achievements
She changed her name to match
      their relucting stars.

She put on makeup, thicker and thicker 
   to make his family her own.
She wore high heels to reach 
   the expectations of onlookers.

As she bit by bit changed, at this moment 
   of pride of both the families,
She realized she had already lost
   the freedom of the past to 
     the luxury of future.

Hear the Woman's Voice - Loud and Clear

This Women's Day has started off making quite an impression on my mind. I am overwhelmed by this feeling which is neither fear, pain, anger nor shame. It is the memory of a wound that simply demands a solution, an end. This wound had probably came along with me on the day I was born, but the broader perspective of my family and their warmth has never let it surface. But the world is not motherly enough to do that. Yes, I am talking about the uncountable and unaccountable crimes against women in India. 

No, these heinous crimes do not just happen to girls of certain age, they happen to girls who are not even out of the mother's womb; for, a girl is a burden not to the woman carrying her, but to the people around her. No, they are not targeted just at girls in jeans or skirts, even fully-clad women are molested; for, there is a fetish of 'almost everything'. No, they do not just happen in cities, ironically they happen and are increasing at an exponential level in rural areas; for, animals know no borders. No, they do not happen at nights, they are committed in broad daylight; for, even a thorn-bedded path seems like bedroom to them. Well, they can happen to anyone, any time, anywhere under any circumstances, one can not set the terms and conditions for these crimes. But, we can definitely narrow down to one reason, 'Thinking Process'. The perpetrators in the 16th Dec Delhi gore, simply thought of it is as a form of enjoyment, a situation where they can gloat over a woman's helpless condition, a chance to prove their male dominance, or may be to teach a lesson. Yes, an uneducated male chauvinist in his journey to teach women a lesson, had tortured, did indescribable things and finally, killed a young to-be doctor. Their incorrigible thinking did not start with their plan to come out and have some fun that night, but it is way deep down. 

As children, they might have seen their father thrashing up their mother, made a bet on pulling a school girl's skirt, made innumerable number of vulgar remarks at people on streets, peeped into the bathrooms of neighbors or I am sure, might have done everything a jobless slum dog would do. There was none to grab their collars and put them on the right track. After all, we are a bundle of values and lessons taught by our parents. Hence, the moss started growing on the already rusty souls. And today it proves no one had even attempted to maneuver them into that route. I thought their consciousness was rolled up and thrown back to be lost in their filthy minds, but today after watching the Nirbhaya documentary, I realized it was never there and would never come.

Crimes against women are not just limited to rape or sexual harassment. They include eve-teasing, condescending behavior and refusal to recognize and acknowledge a job well done at work place, denial of freedom in marriage/career, demand of dowry, denial of all other rights bestowed upon Indian citizens by the Indian Constitution. Anything that draws a line between rights, opportunities, freedom, facilities of men and women can be treated as a crime because we do have the 'Right to Equality'. 

But, will this situation ever change? Will this wound find its end? More than schemes and policies, Education has to find its way towards the children all across the country. Because Victor Hugo once correctly said, "He who opens a school door, closes a prison". I am confident that I would bring up my child to be a sensible individual. And I am sure he does his part in changing the conservative ideas of seniors in my home, which I couldn't accomplish. Well, the days have changed and roles have reciprocated. 

Education is that powerful weapon which can change the world. While the world takes all its time to change, we're here to nudge it all times to move towards the sunnier side. We're here to raise our hands to stop and slap. We're here to fight for each others' rights. 'We' is not the Police Force, Indian Government or any other Special Security Cell. We is I. I am The Woman.

The Girl inside Me!!*

This post was one of my FB statuses when I was still addicted to it. The status went on like this ”Hey yo! I have managed my home damn very well for 4 days without my mom. Wohooo!! I can make a good housewife. *conditions apply.” This post made everyone curious and attracted way too many comments. They started off with people asking what does 'Conditions apply' mean? And then came the hurricane.

Like Carrie Bradshaw said, "Every couple has their own rules". I made them for both, my future husband and me. Wondering it’s a little too early? Agreed. Because, if you want peace, prepare for war, might as well prepare now.  

Rule 0: This is not a rule. Just FYI, I am going to have a professional career just like he has.

Rule 1: He should be a good friend of mine, before being anything else to me.

Rule 2: I Rule, so it is advised to think twice before inviting me into his life.

Rule 3: He should Respect Women, it won’t be accepted at any cost if women are criticised. And no I am not asking him to be a feminist, but just to be a gentleman.

Rule 4: He should never ever lie, if found he'd, the repercussions would be wild.

Rule 5: You should maintain some kind of attitude a.k.a range and should have ultimate taste in everything. Liking everything we see? Na huh.         

Rule 6: I am not a very big fan of Emotional Drama or in today’s terms, Emotional Atyachaar.

Rule 7: I want everything to be perfect. In short, I am a cleanliness and assortment freak.

Rule 8: Should promise me to gift me my RYAN. This will be discussed in person.

Rule 9: This is a little complicated, but I can explain. It is suggested that he should speak negligibly little or nothing about his past love. I know it hurts me more than it does to him. He is a part of my life now (as all the above rules are followed and cleared). Maybe, I can heal you or gradually may even love you.

Rule 10: I don’t expect you to come riding on a white horse, but you should own a beautiful Apache or Fz or R15 or ZMR or CBR.

Rule 11: If Rule 8 is ignored then the gift would be reciprocated to both RYAN & MEGHA at the same time. Once again, this can be discussed personally.

Rule 12: He should not be a pakau.

Rule 13: He should have knowledge about movie dialogues because I use them a lot and I would expect you to understand them.

Rule 14: He should not hate stuff like English music, movies, novels as I am crazy about them.

Rule 15: Rule 14 can be further extended as follows - You should not hate or criticise or make fun of anything that I love, at least you shouldn't express those feelings to me. You have the privilege of changing the topic in such cases.

Rule 16: Rule 16 is omitted.

Rule 17: I believe in ‘Just Do It’. So I expect you to ‘do’, than ‘speak’ of doing them.  

Rule 18: Should wear Desi kurthas occasionally. Hmm, I think it is the only dress in which almost all guys look dashing and amazing.

Rule 19: Thumb Rule: You cannot have similar rules.

Rule 20: I do not use beeps or *** for expletives. Also, you can use them without beeps. Permission

Granted.

Rule 21: We are going to Goa for our post-marriage-tour. Decided.

Rule 22: Should take me to Dominos often. My ‘often’ meant once in a week or fortnight.

Rule 23: This is a freebie for you. Call me with my nicknames, I can almost do anything for you.

Rule 24: My time is an hour or so late than the accepted Indian Time.

Rule 25: All the above and below rules won’t applicable if I have come to love you.

Rule 26: I love the Iraani chai at the local cafes, so they can also be in our regularly visiting places list.

Rule 27: I know I am a grown up, yet at times I love to be treated like a kid.

Rule 28: We are gonna be the residents of Hyderabad forever.

*The language has been tweaked off the original post, to make guys feel less offensive and more comfortable!! Few rules have been withdrawn/changed/omitted, as per my convenience and comfort.

Girls are Girls!!

This post is the outcome of inner outrage caused by the MCPs(Google it) in and around my life.This para specially, lists the people keeping whom in my mind I wrote this post. I don't dedicate this to them. They obviously don't deserve it. And the list starts with those who have misconceptions or their own definitions about girls. They blame the entire clan of girls just because they don’t like one or two or many or may be all. Guys have their so called man-time, where everyone shares his own story. And to the end, they all come to a less-of-conclusion and more-of-judgement out of anger on girls and sympathy for their friends. And for all those Mr. Perfects or at least they think so.And for those whose blood boil when they hear "My persuasion can build a nation" from Beyounce's Who run the World. To all those who laugh with all the sarcasm on the earth, when women is the topic. To all those who feel listening to women singers, reading women writers as a disgrace to their machismo. To all those who like tag themselves and their friends in pics that appear fun to them and disgusting to others. To all those who create groups like "Just For Men" and post pics that make an helpless attempt to prove the worthlessness of women, but by posting those fake pics what actually they prove is their own stupidity. Like I love writing about women, so do they. But the difference is I support women and they do the exact inverse. Movies are made, comedy is spun, messages are forwarded, words are exchanged, stories are written to show women as worthless beings. If this is the case, then it obviously changes the meaning of worthlessness. Being a girl I feel it is my responsibility to make clear the misunderstood feelings of girls and try help them open up their eyes.
       Being a girl is the best part of my life. Girls are dads little angels. They are born as a boon to their parents. Only a woman knows how happy she is for having a baby girl. Because she now has a soul-mate. Only a daughter can understand what it feels like being a woman. Not a son.

       A girl demands a sorry only from her father even for a silly reason and the next person she demands that would be her beloved. 
       People say that girls make issue of almost everything. Can anyone please define what exactly “almost everything” is. Remember the girl who now opposed you, will be a future mother who has the ability to mould children.

       Many say girls don’t use brains. Yes, very true. Because they use their heart. Neither have they brains nor do they use them when something related to their loved ones is involved. I heard many guys say girls are crazy. They are crazy to skip their food and cry for ages when they have a fight with someone they love like life.

       Girls are jealous. Perfectly said. They get jealous only when they don’t get the love and importance they deserve. They know where they stand. Obviously, a girl doesn’t get jealous of Katrina Kaif because her hubby is her big fan. The reason is, she knows she is his life and not Katrina.

       Girls are selfish, it seems. They sacrifice anything and everything for an unknown someone. By the way, here I can define what is “anything and everything”. Everything means her sweet home, family, her room, bed, importantly her lifestyle. Anything means her sacrifice has no limits. And it includes issues as important as her career, goals, and ambitions. When is the meaning of sacrifice changed to selfish??

       A girl wanna look special not to the whole world but just for the one she loves. Girls talk too much. But to everyone else in their life, just to you. They spend loads of time shopping because they always want the best. They are never tired of waiting for the best. By the way if a guy is a friend to any girl, it’s not just by chance. But by choice. By her choice.
       Once I read a message saying, “A girl loves too many and a guy loves too much”. Yup, a girl loves even her family, friends and of course her lover. And a guy, loves a girl ignoring everyone around him to such a great extent that he finds solace only in slicing her throat right in the middle of a city road or by throwing acid on her face. This simply emphasizes on the fact that guys are jealous to let their love live her life with someone she likes. And the gory incidents of killing his beloved partner and then himself, quoting the reason as "Death at the same time in this life, helps them mingle together in next life." How shameful and stupid on their part. 

                                                              This is what a girl is... 

                                       
       This is how we girls are. Always a sweet heart. First to dad, then to brother, husband, and son. We gossip, we laugh loudly, we talk non-stop.We rule many lives, we guide, we mould, we love, we learn, we adjust, we regret, we forget, we shout, we fight. We exaggerate things because excitement is in our blood. We expect replies even for forward messages. We crack jokes for which no one laughs. After all, we are what we are. So, stop complaining and start loving!!

*Point to be noted "Exceptions always exist"